To rediscover this energy.

Irony is it???

I have come across many ironical things in my life, some have a deep routed connection, I wonder, did someone know about it so well for it to happen this way. Yes, I watch my life too close to recognize every minute change happening in it.

I am not going to mention the first ironical thing that happened in my life, as it is far too personal. Lemme pour my thoughts over the second one.

There had been situations where I had stood in the tip of a tall mountain, starring at distance, my feet almost leaving the edge. But I did not fall. The whole scene interchanged as if it was a stage from a play/ movie. From this scare, I learned to be grateful. Grateful for every single thing that happened. Impulsive acts done by people did not bother me. This screen that replaced the scary mountain top became more colorful day by day. I was in a place which I would call Home away from home. I had felt the walls speak, even in the strangest moments of anonymity and sobriety I felt a sense of familiarity around. It was a surprise to discover this Home away from Home which I live now, was built when I was born. The years I was growing up, I had always wondered what awaits me next and when I reach there, it is as if I already knew I would be here one day, & this is ‘that’ day. Strangely true. I am grateful for that unknown energy that bought me here, today, to rediscover the connection and to feel grateful about it. Is it not intriguing to think, the day you were born and you were growing up, miles and miles away something else was happening, the fruit of which you get to know years later. Does it not surprise you to realize, when you were fighting and getting distressed for something meaningless, something else was happening somewhere parallel and you get to be a part of it and relive the same moments in a different way. May be some of you can relate to what I sound here and may be some of you already frown upon me for I make no sense whatsoever.

To wind up, I feel grateful to this energy which bought me to where I stand today and to shower upon the immense opportunities which I get.

The caution wall

I read somewhere that some people pass through your life for a reason. Let them leave, the purpose is served. I beg to differ as I see no purpose except that it left a huge pile of garbage called hatred which had not been rinsed off even with years of invested time. No good happened while they existed inclusive of waste of men, money, machinery and material in business terms and misleading moments in actual terms. I would like to hunt for an answer on why at all this has to happen. Whether or not I received an answer yet, I learned “Caution”. Caution is a virtual circular wall around within a 10 to 50-meter radius having large number of filters to finally allow any one near the acknowledgment zone. I am glad, one good outcome of the garbage was creation of this wall which made world a better place to live.

Heart

It had been a long time since I let my heart wander. If you are familiar with the awkward yeti, you will get what I mean. In the quest of ticking my list, I failed to realize that my heart had been kept a captive. I had to clock my odds and conquer the unfinished. Time, that is what I lack. The heart had to wait. Not my mistake, Heart had not made sense and I did not have time for child’s play.

I needed a break, but, had calculated breaks. The space around me had closed upon. Every inch was marked and pre-decided. Life was wonderful. Routines were perfect. Days passed.

It was time to take those much awaited long drives. I knew it was not the cool breeze that awaited but it was the pride and power of steering the wheels on those long expansive roads, fear had no room, it was to experience the accomplished.

Destinations set, I had taken help of google map, the woman instructed me to get there. Her voice helped but not always. How much ever I tried to follow her blindly, I got lost. I was attentive but failed to perceive. Exits after exits, wrong ways, confusing roads, dead ends, heart came to help, without prejudice, I followed my instincts. It took me a handful of rides to see how much I had lost my heart in the rat race. The rides made sense when i re-discovered my heart.

With a pinch of salt!!!

Ain’t it annoying when people end up replying only to the last sentence of your super kool professional mail.. May be it was too much to expect the same humility in return !!! If it helps, the mail reads this way,

Dear Mam,

Trust this mail finds you well.

Thank you for your co-operation.

Warm Regards,
Mr X
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My Disclosure:
1. I am the Intended recipient.
2. I have not received this as error.
3. Will not use this info anywhere else.
4. Thank you individual sender to have asked about my well-being which is what the mail is pretty much about.
5.I am forced to ignore this mail but to follow up my content with an alternative.

Art and me!!!

There was a side of me that had the ability to appreciate art, I am disappointed that I lost it in my quest of freedom, freedom from varied inner fears. Today when I see many such work of precision, all I see is the effort, perceived by me in terms of cost and price. When I force my brain to focus on the art and to think of what the artist meant, my brain behaves silly, it screams ‘what non-sense’!!!

Back home, far far away from these artists, we used to have festivals(temple/church)… Small vendors showed up with cute stuffs priced amazingly reasonable. In balloons we had apple balloons (my favorite), nitrogen balloons (it flew away all the time), balloons that had sand inside and many more. We had flutes, spinning toys (top otherwise), leafs that blew in circles when blown and so much more. It was unbelievable when you see the same stuff remade in an expensive way, with a demo book and got sold like pancakes.  Now, this is the silly part of me seeing it that way. Narrow minded. Unable to accept the broad aspect over it. Things that I cannot correlate I find them silly and things I correlate; it is on a very basic level. Effort have gone into all of them. It is their passion and outlook that make them different. Alarmingly, Why do i fail to think, many of these small vendors might have been artists too…

Well, this is the creative world. They sell ideas but in a very different form. You and I do not understand, it is their world and I applaud them for this amazing ability they have. Long live art. Long live people who see and live art. I am so glad, that at the end of the day, i am able to see art and a smile of appreciation blooms within me.

Chalakudy, Kerala, India, UAE, London!!!

Kindly picture yourself as an Alien and describe your imagination.

Duhhh…. Who said Alien means ET and from Mars and scary but sweet and helpful and all that., It also means a foreigner, especially one who is not a naturalized citizen of the country where he or she is living. And, that was me when I ended up on a team with all English and Arab peers, if English was familiar, Arabic was a “Woaaahhh, that sounds very very different”. But, that was fine, people understand, they help, you find they are all nice… west or east people have similar thoughts but different living styles/ backgrounds/ beliefs. Hence, let me quote down a couple of situations I had with them.

Lunch

It is a moment when everyone from all the departments meet. It Is indeed a great platform as they all share their thoughts, informative conversations (technical / analytical), people who get both fascinated or argumentative as per their mood or platform or whatever. But, that’s definitely not the challenge I meant. It is the ‘Food’. For lunch we have varieties of Soup, Chicken wings and French fries, Pasta and shrimps (differing Continental Cuisine), Biriyani (Lamp or Camel and Beef), kebab, Fish, Chicken and in veg White rice, mostly dal (least consumed) and green salad. The moment we enter this great place of wisdom and social interaction the smell gets you disappointed and heartbroken considering how hungry you are. For people, who are reading this and who are not familiar with my background, I am a Tambrahm, an elite class of Palakkad Iyer, descendant from a much respected class of vadhyar (priests), Herbivorous (the mere thought of any other food would have normally made a tambrahm go insane), with a cultural background which you find very hard to explain to people of same country let alone people of west/ middle east. With that intro, the questions and statements that are thrown upon me includes

  1. “hey, are you a veg or a vegan!!! “
  2. “Why do you not eat non-veg”
  3. “It must be very hard for you not to eat these amazing stuff”
  4. “Its sad that your culture forbids you from these”
  5. “Oh you poor thing”

And, you have to reply with a casual that’s Alright when in fact you are adjusting a lot trying to eat with all the plates around you that have nothing but meat (and I see animated meat which are rather raw).

Origin

I have to declare my heart felt gratitude to the Cochin biennale here. Though I have not been to this or have no idea what it is, people around the globe do. And, that had been my reference ever since. It goes like this

Them – where are you from
Me – India
Them – Which part of India
Me – South (I assume they don’t know any further but I am wrong)
Them – Where in South
Me – Kerala
Them – Have you been to the Cochin Biennele
Me – That’s where I am from (Since, I have not been to, I don’t want to say No but this is my answer)
One of them – Kerala is Where Adam or Eve was send, who exactly was send
Another of Them – I think Thomas was also send
Me – Smile and nod!!!

Arundhathi and Dhruva Nakshathram Vs Fashion Statement

I love this place as it taught me East or West women like to notice and complement each other. I used to be complimented on the ‘Mettis’ or toe ring I wore saying it looks amazing and they want to get one too when I always end up saying ‘That is a part of our tradition to wear it’ and they reply ‘That’s an amazing one’. To People who really want to know

After Saptapadi (Seven steps around the fire that confirms the marriage); the grooms sister gently slips silver rings or “Mettis” on brides toes. The couple is then shown the Dhruva Nakshatra or Pole Star, the one who attained immortality through single-minded devotion and perseverance and also the “Arundhathi Nakshatra”, as the ideal wife – the embodiment of charity and virtue. This is symbolic of the fact that such virtues are to be emulated throughout marital life. Something, which is practically not possible to explain to people around you.

My story and happenings continue but I cut short my post.